“Time management is an oxymoron. Time is beyond our control, and the clock keeps ticking regardless of how we lead our lives. Priority management is the answer to maximizing the time we have.” - John C. Maxwell
I feel as though things are beginning to come together somewhat. I’m finding a groove. The John Maxwell quote above is simple. Most of the things that I read in John’s books and so many others are just that. Simple. And, yet, so few of us behave in ways that show that we recognize the truth of such simple statements. Most of us know the “right thing” to do when it comes to making a decision about our finances or our diet, and, still, we often find ourselves doing something other than that right thing.
I am currently attending grad school at a United Methodist Seminary just north of Columbus in pursuit of a masters in counseling. My calling, my drive to pursue this path, originally came from my desire to help others who, like me, have found themselves conflicted in the arenas of sexuality and spirituality. Another unexpected way in which I am finding myself compelled to serve is in the field of addictions and recovery. Both the course work and recovery community themselves have taught me tremendous lessons.
When I went to my first few AA meetings, I thought of myself as just an observer. Not being an addict, I wanted to respectfully experience and know what that experience is like for those clients that I will be encouraging to attend such meetings. The experience changed once I began to realize and open myself up to the fact that, addict or not, all of us can gain something from being in that circle of community and vulnerability.
One of the things that I have learned from the recovery community is the power and importance of routine. Routine can be your worst enemy or your greatest source of strength. If you're wanting to stop drinking, you should probably stop walking or driving home the same route that takes you past your favorite liquor store. As human beings, we are creatures of habit. I came across a Joyce Meyer quote earlier today that says, “First we form habits and then they form us.” There is so much truth in that. If we want to change something about ourselves, we must first change our habits.
Regina Leeds, the zen-organizing guru that I have mentioned in previous posts has me, through her books, working on some basic foundational habits to getting me to be more organized. Again, the best stuff is almost always the simple stuff. I’m making my bed every morning. When dishes are done in the dishwasher, they immediately come out and go into the cupboards, allowing dirty dishes to go into the dishwasher instead of languishing in the sink. The same with clothes. When they are finished in the dryer, the get folded or put on hangers and put away. Believe me. I’m still a mess, but these first steps give me hope.
Another habit that I’m trying to get into my routine is going to the gym regularly. One of the perks of my apartment is that my lease includes a free gym membership. I don’t even have the cost to use as an excuse. I’m more of a night owl, and I work second shift hours. In the past, I’m gone to the gym at night after work. In the interest of rearranging my priorities and bringing a little more balance into my life, I’m trying to stop feeding myself the excuse of “I’m just not a morning person.” Now, even though I don’t go to work until the afternoon, my alarm goes off at 8:00 AM, and I’m at the gym by 9:00. Then, I head home to do a little cleaning, reading, and get ready for work. When I walk into work now, I can do so already feeling like I’ve accomplished something for the day, and, even though I still have a long way to go, I’ve taken steps forward towards meeting some of my goals. When I get home from work, I don’t feel guilty about watching an hour of television and doing some writing. I’m still very early in these new habits, and, like anyone new to recovery knows, relapse could be a very short step away, but I guess I will handle it the same way they would, one day at a time.
- Culbs
© Joshua Culbertson 2014
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